Change Master

Everything comes and goes. One arises and then passes. Nothing is permanent. But in spite of this, beauty can come out. This is change and impermanence, and how they work in life.

We all want change for the better- change in our living environment, change in our situations, and even change in ourselves. This means flowing with the circumstances we like and don't like. If we always stick to a mindset of a life of security, certainty, and comfort, we go against the waves of reality and miss out on the bright side of the difficulties faced.

As far as we're still living, we ought to be masters in the art of change. Just like any other form of art, it takes time and effort to learn until we can perfectly pick up on it. Once we do so, we know how to deal with the surprises life throws at us. We can ride along the life course winningly.

I'm no expert at this. I still have a lot to learn from here. But all I know is it's one of the things I need to bring along in the long run. I think of the different changes in life we encounter and how to go along with them. So here are these ones:

1. Change of behavior
This makes me speak of bad habits. We want to get rid of these, yet their overwhelming power makes it hard to do so. We have our ideal scenes play in our minds when we've put off the habit, yet they don't seem to come to reality. We're stuck in the same old rut, and we almost feel like giving up. At times, we feel desperate to get out of the deadly, vicious cycle they've made.

There's always hope to overcome them. But it has to be on us for that decision. And when the first step is taken, we need to have lots of focus and mental energy. It's going to be a tough road ahead in order to get to the goal to attain. The commitment is also important. The vow we make is not only for ourselves but also to others.

We can start with one habit at a time. We then fully devote to get better and better at them. In the midst of discomfort, frustration and the instances of triggers and urges to go back to the old habit, we improve the habit without fail, over and over, until it becomes part of our system. It's where we develop mindfulness in ourselves. And by overcoming the habits, we make the pursuit worthwhile by enjoying the process. It's fine to take gradual progression on them, as long as we engage ourselves in self-improvement. 

2. Change of perspective
In life, we face frustration with others, unhappiness with ourselves, distractions, financial problems and more. These rise up due to our ideals that don't match with reality. This calls for a heart check. When one goes through suffering, the heart responds in either two ways. Either it chooses to wish for them to meet up its ideal or it chooses to accept them for who they are and see the beauty in them.

There's a higher chance that things don't go our way, leaving us with our only option. And it's a tough one to take. Melting the tightness, tension, and resistance is hard, most especially when we've clung strongly to our ideals. It's where forgetting the self is needed. It's painful, but there'll come a time where appreciation and gratitude take place after. Many of these will come along. As long as we're open to them, we can flow well.

The changes of life come differently. They can come one at a time, or even in a single day. As far as experience goes, here are a few things we can be assured of:

* It's okay to pour out your emotions.
It's alright to release the sadness, anger, blame or loss, as long as they're done for a moment. Dwelling too much on them can leave no room to deal with the situation currently faced.

* You're not the only one in your situation.
We're not alone. There's always our strong support, family and close friends, who'll be there to listen, empathize, help, encourage and strengthen to build us up. Even if we don't ask them to be around us, they'll always come to our side.

* It's okay to be vulnerable.
It's alright to feel weak, scared or wanting to ask for help. We allow them to see the real us, and they can give a thing or two of what we're going through. There's always learning and growth that can come from it.

* We have the ability to adapt to anything.
The situation may be difficult. But we have the capacity to find ways to solve problems and do things in new and different ways. That's a given. All it takes is knowing and believing in ourselves that we can ride on the change.

* There's always hope for the future.
There's hope in the midst of it all. With that positive perspective, we can move forward every day. When we take this as our way to cope with the change, things will work out eventually.

* You'll grow as a person, but you'll stay the same.
Change takes us to a whole round turn. We see life and things differently. With added wisdom, we become stronger and better. But this doesn't make us different human beings. We can newly learn to make a difference for others and still stay grounded as we are then.

Every change is an opportunity for us to get rid of the selfishness present in us to become the selfless, alive individuals we were meant to be. We can't control what we can't do, but we can always control what we can do. As long as we know how to work with them, we can sail on well.